Slap Her – Violence Against Women

Please share your thoughts on Slap Her – Violence Against Women, a short video production about boys and violence towards girls.

Slap Her – Violence Against Women

What does Slap Her – Violence Against Women teach us about values and raising children?

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“Violence isn’t always evil. What’s evil is the infatuation with violence.” Jim Morrison

1 Is 2 Many PSA – Violence Against Women

 

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“Calling gender violence a women’s issue is part of the problem. It gives a lot of men an excuse not to pay attention.” Jackson Katz

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“Violence, even well-intentioned, always rebounds upon oneself.” Lao Tzu

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“All of the violence that doesn’t occur doesn’t get reported on the news.” Steven Pinker

From A Call To Men, Works to create a world where all men and boys are loving and respectful, and all women and girls are valued and safe.

“From early on, men and boys are taught that they should be strong, they should lead, and that they should be in charge. But if that is what we are saying about men and boys, then what are we saying about women and girls?

Our culture teaches us that women and girls are of less value, that they are the property of men, and sexual objects.  These ways of relating to women and girls create an environment where many men choose to act violently or disrespectfully against women.  In addition, they lead men who don’t commit violence to believe that it is a “women’s issue” that they don’t need to be concerned about.  This isn’t true.

Violence against women is a human rights issue.  And it has a real impact on all women.  Men’s violence causes women and girls to have to worry when walking down the street at night alone, to have their keys ready, to check the backseat of their car.  Is this any way for half of the population to have to live? Is this how you want the women you love – your wife, daughter, sister, best friend, or mother – to have to live?

We know it isn’t. And we can change it.  You can stand up for equality and begin re-defining masculinity right now by doing these three things:

1. Explore the ways that the Man Box impacts you and your life.

We all have been socialized to see men and women as different.  Reflect on the ideas and expectations that you have been taught about manhood and how they affect you on a daily basis.  What are the wonderful things about manhood? What are the limitations? Understanding our collective socialization of manhood can provide you with an opportunity to increase your understanding of why violence against women and girls is such an enormous problem in our society – and why so many men are silent about it.

2. Ask the women in your life about their experiences.  

Sexual harassment, sexual assault, domestic violence, and degrading treatment against women doesn’t just happen to certain types of women.  It happens to all women – despite their age, income, education level, and race.  And it happens to the women that we know and love.  In order to be part of the solution of ending violence against women and girls, we need to understand what it is like to be a woman or girl in this society.  Ask the women in your life about their experiences with men – and listen and respect their responses.  Believe them.

3.  Speak out against violent or degrading language or behavior.

When something happens that is offensive to women – a degrading joke, a disrespectful song lyric, a violent commercial – you can simply say “wow – that is really offensive”.  Simply challenging the acceptability of this type of cultural norm can send a powerful message to other men that violence and discrimination against women is no laughing matter – and that it is okay for men to care about it.”

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From Men Stopping Violence – Working Together For A Change

“For many years, violence against women has been seen as a “women’s issue” but is a human issue. The question is, “Why would men want to get involved in ending violence against women?” The answer is, “because they have daughters.” Men have daughters, sisters, friends, mothers, co-workers and other women in their lives who men want to be safe but they do not have the skills or tools to help create that safety.”

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“If you and I are having a single thought of violence or hatred against anyone in the world at this moment, we are contributing to the wounding of the world.” Deepak Chopra

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I am aware there are many quotes in this post. I thought it was important to share diverse voices and perspectives on violence and violence against women. I invite you to share your experiences with violence against women and Slap Her. As always, please be honest and respectful.

 

Other posts you may enjoy:

Doubt

The Relationship Blame Game

Stop Stalking and Start Talking

Why You Don’t Have To Be Right All The Time

Listening as an Art and Skill to Improving Relationships

Things Your Couples Counselor Already Knows About Your Relationship

Do Something Good For Someone Else, and Don’t Get Caught – Kindness

 

Michael Swerdloff

Providence Life Coaching and  Reiki Counseling


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