Spiritual Bypassing, Relationships and The Shadow

Providence Holistic Counseling Services - Rumi - Change - Portrait of a boy with the map of the world painted on his face.

I first started becoming aware of spiritual bypassing a few years ago. My eyes opened wide as I was reading the page in front of me. "A spiritual bypass or spiritual bypassing is a "tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks" John Welwood & Tina Fossella. This was it! This was the thing I had been aware of for years in myself and others that I had not known what it was or how to describe it! I was so excited that there really was such a "thing," and it had a name. I have cut out parts of the article below, but most of the content on spiritual bypassing is included.

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It’s Never Too Late To Be Amazing

Never too late. At age 23, Tina Fey was working at a YMCA. At age 23, Oprah was fired from her first reporting job. At age 24, Stephen King was working as a janitor and living in a trailer. At age 27, Vincent Van Gogh failed as a missionary and decided to go to art school. At age 28, J.K. Rowling was a suicidal single parent living on welfare. At age 28, Wayne Coyne (from The Flaming Lips) was a fry cook. At age 30, Harrison Ford was a carpenter. At age 30, Martha Stewart was a stockbroker. At age 37, Ang Lee was a stay-at-home-dad working odd jobs. Julia Child ...

Surrender

Surrender. Is there a scarier or more freeing word than surrender? Surrender. I invite you to sit with this word and let it move around in your mind and belly. What does surrender bring up for you? Panic? Fear? Humiliation? Joy? Victory? Success? Freedom? Release?...

The Invisible White Rabbit – A Parable in Determination

Wake Poetry - Providence Holistic Counseling Services

The Invisible White Rabbit - A Parable in Determination is based on a story by Edward Hays. I think The Invisible White Rabbit is an excellent source of inspiration and wisdom for those trying to forge a spiritual journey. We all know this journey takes incredible determination and perseverance. Many New Age books make it sound easy with their claims of "Five Easy Steps Towards Enlightenment", but anyone who has done any deep spiritual work is acutely aware that it is not easy or fast. But how do we stay on the path with life's challenges and surprises?...

Do Something Good For Someone Else, and Don’t Get Caught – Kindness

13 Ways Gratitude Will Significantly Improve Your Life | Psychology Today - Providence Holistic Counseling Services

Kindness. Many years ago, a friend looked me in the eye and said, "If you want humility, and you really need it, do something good for someone else and don't get caught". My immediate thought was to punch him in the mouth; fortunately, I chose to just shut up and be angry. Do something good for someone else, and don't get caught. This phrase haunted me. I could not understand why you would want to do something good for somebody else and not get credit any for it. What was the point? What would I get out of it? How would they know I did it? The little I did not understand this spiritual truth. ...

Spiritual Greed and Gluttony – Dark Night of The Soul

I remember about a dozen years ago, I was going through a particularly challenging time that felt like a hopeless period In my personal and spiritual development. Among other things, my mentor suggested that I read and meditate on Dark Night Of The Soul by St. John of The Cross. She suggested I pay close attention to the teachings on spiritual greed and gluttony. I immediately became furious at her but pretended as if I was okay. Of course, she knew better. Like any "good student" who wants to prove to his mentor just how good a student he is, I left her and directly went to buy a copy of the book.