28 results for tag: Healthy Relationships
Fight Languages: How we Argue Is Key to Healthy Relationships
For those of you who have been reading my posts for a while, you are aware of The Rules For Fair Fighting in Relationships. Many of you know the Five Love Languages Gary Chapman, Ph.D., introduced. If not, you can learn about them easily here. What are the five love languages? The concept of fight languages having a name is new to me. I understood the principles but did not have a term to express them.
How we fight with our partner(s), friends, family, and neighbors often defines the nature of our relationships. Understanding how your partner or friends/family argue is essential to creating thoughtful, loving resolutions, trust, and safety....
Co-Regulation and Healthy Relationships
Co-Regulation is when two people provide support for each other as a means of creating emotional safety, security, and connection. We need to connect with other people. It is that simple. There is a lot of information out there that convinces people that the goal is to be "self-sufficient" as if that is possible even if it were true. There never has been and never will be a time when being self-sufficient is best for us. Besides, we need food, shelter, the earth, sun and moon, water, air, clothing, beds, transportation, tools, machines, soil, trees, etc.; we need others whether we like it or not! We are not built to be self-sufficient, and that is a blessing!
We are wired to be connected with other people and possibly other species. Many of us were not taught or demonstrated how to do this in a healthy, safe manner. This makes the illusion of trying to be self-sufficient seductive and tempting. We want to find a more straightforward method than investing the time and energy required to build these safe and healthy relationships. We want an easy way out where it is unnecessary to lean into our fears of connection and intimacy.
Most folks are terrified of letting others in and allowing ourselves to be that vulnerable and exposed.So what do we do? We begin by creating inner safety and a sense of security that "I will be OK no matter what." This sense of safety and security provides the foundation for us to trust others because we know we are solid and secure. They may hurt us, but we will survive and, over time, thrive. Connection with others is what supports us in being independent....
Sex Therapy – Is It Time to See a Sex Therapist?
How do you know when it is time to see a Sex Therapist or Sex Counselor? First things first, how do you know IF you would benefit from seeing a Sex Therapy or Sex Counseling?
What is Sex Therapy and Sex Counseling?
Sex Therapy 101
"First, let’s talk about what this particular type of therapy is. Put very simply, the goal is to help you have a sex life that feels healthy and happy to you. Sex therapy recognizes that sexuality is an integral part of our lives and seeks to provide education and resources to support you. It can include things like identifying your beliefs or blockages around sex, helping you gain clarity on your goals for your sex life, providing accurate and shame-free information, teaching new sexual skills, improving your communication, or developing sexual self-confidence. Even though there still aren’t a ton of sex therapists out there, I think it’s really important to look around before picking who you want to work with. I strongly believe that the fit between the sex therapist and client is important. If you don’t feel connected to and trusting of who you work with, you’re not going to get much benefit out of the experience. Check out the websites of a few therapists in detail before booking an appointment, and don’t be afraid to end your working relationship if your gut’s telling you it doesn’t feel right." This excerpt is from What Happens In Sex Therapy? by VANESSA MARIN...
Are You Really Being Accountable?
In the last handful of years, there has been an increased focus on accountability and taking responsibility for our actions. I have really appreciated the energy and attention to wanting to do and be better, primarily birthed by Gen Z and Millennials. It’s about time!
But are we truly being accountable, or are we just telling people what we’ve done wrong and why we did it?
I invite you to read the full article on being accountable, including the steps to cleaning up mistakes here: Are you really being accountable?
Being responsible and accountable is about changing our behaviors, and the patterns that create them. It’s not about ...
As Friendships Grow Closer – Jeff Brown
I have been reflecting on this Jeff Brown quote on friendships lately. We tend to focus our efforts towards relationships on our romantic/intimate partnerships and family. But what about friendships?
What if we carried the same intention and effort with our main friendships, or "friendship pods"?
I am incredibly grateful for my core group of friends and how impactful our love, support, and collective commitment are and have been in my life, especially during the height of the pandemic. I am inspired continuously by our willingness as individuals and as a group to walk towards challenges, not away.
"As friendships grow closer, conflict be...
Being Better Humans Support Group (Online)!
Come join the circle!
What are we doing?
We are a support group of people discussing their honest feelings on relationships, drugs, love, sex, money, and work. We’ll pick a topic, trade stories, have a moderated discussion, and maybe scream, cry, or yell (if needed). We’ll dive in deep and not let fear keep us from expressing who we really are. We’ll explore what makes us amazing and far from amazing, where we need to grow and what gets in the way of growing, how to trust ourselves and others and what obstacles get in the way of trust. We’ll find what environments support our safety, and how to set boundaries in those that don’t. Most importantly, we’ll just practice being our authentic selves. We may include meditation, movement and other practices designed to create clarity, presence and truth. What we do will be guided by what shows up at every session. We will have assignments between sessions to reflect more deeply and practice whatever we worked on together.
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Book Release: Raised by Wolves, Possibly Monsters
Find out about this exciting new book here.
