22 results for tag: Love
Sexy Weakness – The Sexual Power of Emotional Vulnerability
Sexy weakness? What on earth is that? As a man, like millions of other men, I was taught that being vulnerable was bad and a sign of being weak. I was taught women want a man who is strong, stable, and "tough," whatever the heck that means. I was taught that you keep your emotions in check and never let anyone see who you really are. Like never. It has taken me decades to unlearn some of this programming. Parts of it were easy and simple to leave behind; other elements took longer and needed more attention and intention. More importantly, women did not feel safe around me because I didn't feel safe around me or my thoughts. I typically attracted ...
The Real Reason Women Leave Men – Trust and Safety
I am not a fan of clickbait headlines. I saw this today on The Good Man Project, and that was enough for me to read it and see if there was substance to the sensationalistic tagline. There is definitely content here that is worth the time to explore why women leave men. Of course, relationships can be very complicated, and the reason Matthew Fray offers is simplistic but valid and credible. I encourage you to invest the time to read his post on why women leave men.
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... Arguments About $ Aren’t About Money
Arguments. The first time I meet a new couple that I am working with, I ask them to each share why they are here today. Almost without exception, they each launch into a one-sided description of a recent argument, telling it solely from their perspective. In their minds, they are seeking relationship counseling because of an argument or arguments.
I ask a few more questions to get a greater understanding of their current challenges. Most of the time, they continue to refer back to the argument or arguments previously mentioned.
I will follow that up with a question similar to this, "So if I am hearing you correctly, you are here because of an argument or arguments, not due to a lack of trust, connection, respect, communication, commitment, safety, and/or intimacy?".
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... Being Better Humans Support Group
We have an amazing Support Group for Everyone! We have been meeting every other Monday on Zoom! Come join the circle!
What are we doing?
We are a group of people discussing their honest feelings on relationships, drugs, love, sex, money, and work. We’ll pick a topic, trade stories, have a moderated discussion, and maybe scream, cry, or yell (if needed). We’ll dive in deep and not let fear keep us from expressing who we really are. We’ll explore what makes us amazing and far from amazing, where we need to grow and what gets in the way of growing, how to trust ourselves and others and what obstacles get in the way of trust. We’ll find what environments support our safety, and how to set boundaries in those that don’t. Most importantly, we’ll just practice being our authentic selves. We may include meditation, movement and other practices designed to create clarity, presence and truth. What we do will be guided by what shows up at every session. We will have assignments between sessions to reflect more deeply and practice whatever we worked on together.
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Better Men’s Support Group!
We have created a Men’s Support Group on Zoom. Six men are already participating. We have been meeting bi-weekly since the Spring, and it is amazing. Get your seat at the table.
What are we doing?
We are a group of men discussing their honest feelings on relationships, drugs, love, sex, money, and work. We’ll pick a topic, trade stories, have a moderated discussion, and maybe yell (if needed).
Hormones In Relationships – Are You a ‘Testosterone’ or a ‘Dopamine?’
We are all affected by hormones in relationships. I am fascinated by this work and its potential in understanding relationship choices and exploring the impact of hormones on relationships. How does this influence our compatibility or lack thereof? I appreciate there are four distinct profile types, dopamine, serotonin, testosterone, and estrogen, in no particular order. The fact that they move beyond the limitations of the two profile types of estrogen and testosterone feels more honest and accurate than defining folks by just the two hormones and dismissing the effects of dopamine and serotonin. Hormones in relationships are a real thing, ...
Mindful Sex – A Solution To Unhappy Sex Lives
Mindful Sex. The words even sound funny together. Sex, by its nature, is mindful enough, in theory. Why do we need mindful sex, and what is mindful sex?
It is easy to decide, "This is the thing I need to do to fix my relationships and sex life". This is not one of those kinds of solutions, assuming such a thing exists. Mindful sex can be a gateway towards a more fulfilling and intimate experience of making love and intimacy. Mindful sex does not replace destructive, unfulfilling old habits or patterns. Mindful sex helps create new ones and revitalize those that were once joyful and alive! We still have to do our work.
Mindfulness and being present have become serious buzzwords in recent years. For those of us who have practiced these skills and arts for decades, it can sometimes feel like they are the latest in a long line of techniques in "microwave recovery" for whatever ails us. Here is the fascinating part: it's true and has been for thousands of years! The packaging and terminology have changed, but meditation, breathing, paying attention, and being where we are right now are the foundations of most major psychological, religious, and spiritual traditions. Ironically, people often label them as New Age practices, when in reality, they are older than "traditional" methods that people are finding are not as effective for us in today's world. Mindful sex is an extension of these practices. Again, there is nothing "new" to mindful sex. We have just given it a fancy, trendy name. It is like what we used to call tropical rainforests "jungles". There was minimal interest in preserving jungles, but tropical rainforests create an image that people want to support. We can think of mindful sex as undistracted sex while fully immersed in the experience. Who doesn't want deep, meaningful sexual and intimate experiences?
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