43 results for tag: Marriage Counseling
Mindful Sex – A Solution To Unhappy Sex Lives
Mindful Sex. The words even sound funny together. Sex, by its nature, is mindful enough, in theory. Why do we need mindful sex, and what is mindful sex?
It is easy to decide, "This is the thing I need to do to fix my relationships and sex life". This is not one of those kinds of solutions, assuming such a thing exists. Mindful sex can be a gateway towards a more fulfilling and intimate experience of making love and intimacy. Mindful sex does not replace destructive, unfulfilling old habits or patterns. Mindful sex helps create new ones and revitalize those that were once joyful and alive! We still have to do our work.
Mindfulness and being present have become serious buzzwords in recent years. For those of us who have practiced these skills and arts for decades, it can sometimes feel like they are the latest in a long line of techniques in "microwave recovery" for whatever ails us. Here is the fascinating part: it's true and has been for thousands of years! The packaging and terminology have changed, but meditation, breathing, paying attention, and being where we are right now are the foundations of most major psychological, religious, and spiritual traditions. Ironically, people often label them as New Age practices, when in reality, they are older than "traditional" methods that people are finding are not as effective for us in today's world. Mindful sex is an extension of these practices. Again, there is nothing "new" to mindful sex. We have just given it a fancy, trendy name. It is like what we used to call tropical rainforests "jungles". There was minimal interest in preserving jungles, but tropical rainforests create an image that people want to support. We can think of mindful sex as undistracted sex while fully immersed in the experience. Who doesn't want deep, meaningful sexual and intimate experiences?
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... Do Feelings Matter? Refections on Feelings in Our Lives
I was recently reading an article in Psychology Today, Life Lessons: 16 Truths to Embrace Now. Providence Holistic Counseling Services is listed in Psychology Today, so I receive a print copy monthly. I rarely read the articles because they feel like typical pop culture, with sensationalistic headlines and not a lot of solid content. I also find that the cover is typically an image of a young, white, attractive, thin female Photoshopped to look seductive with thick lipstick covering parted lips. An embarrassment to the industry. Now and then, I am wrong, and they dig a little deeper. The ideas of the various writers who contributed to this article are helpful and well-written. One of them referenced how the current generation of young adults places a great preference on what they feel and their emotions. This got me thinking. The question that came to mind is, "Do feelings matter?"
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... Building Bridges or Building Walls
In relationships, we typically either build bridges or walls. When we build bridges, we work towards connection, intimacy, and safety. In contrast, when we build walls, we move towards distance, isolation, discomfort, and/or lack of safety. When we think about conflict resolution, it usually comes down to building bridges or walls.
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Drugs Don’t Cause Addiction: This Brilliant Video Will Change Your View on Drugs Forever
Drugs Don’t Cause Addiction: This Brilliant Animated Video Will Change Your View on Drugs Forever. I do not know if it "changed my view on drugs forever", but it is very interesting, and the work he has done toward shifting the mindset of addiction globally is outstanding. It is time we all let go of the old assumptions about addiction and its causes. They are not correct or productive in moving towards a healthier society or reducing the number of people struggling with addiction, whatever their drug of choice may be.
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... Obsessions and Compulsions: Zen Buddhism Help or Hurt?
Obsessions and compulsions, we all have them. Does Buddhism help or hurt those trying to learn how to live life without being controlled by their obsessions and compulsions? Zen Buddhism can be a very orderly and defined practice. Zen Buddhism is often regimented, or at least many practitioners and teachers practice that way. Our discussion today is whether Zen Buddhism supports recovery of obsessions and compulsions or the actual obsessions and compulsions themselves. Obsession and compulsions Zen Buddhism have a unique relationship, so let's explore it together.
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... 11 Reasons Why You Should Never Hide How Weird You Are
As a child, and even more so as a teenager, I was taught that in all situations, no matter what was happening, you must hide how weird you are. I repeat, you must hide how weird you are! This mindset was supported by the majority of people in my life, including school and family and, to a lesser extent, peers.
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... Going Beyond Our Prisons
"The real power of the Buddha was that he had so much love. He saw people trapped in their notions of small separate self, feeling guilty or proud of that self, and he offered revolutionary teachings that resounded like a lion's roar, like a great rising tide, helping people to wake up and break free from the prison of ignorance." Tich Nhat Hanh
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