53 results for tag: Providence Spiritual Life Coach
9 Signs You’ve Done Your Shadow Work
What are the signs you've done your shadow work?
None of them constantly quote famous authors, Gurus, and teachers.
None of them tell anybody who listens or reads that they must do their shadow work.
None of them use their spiritual knowledge as a marketing technique for economic success.
None of them believe that they know the singular "right way" to lead a spiritually guided life.
None of them claim that they have "completed" their shadow work....
How Breathing Calms Your Brain
It's about time that science has caught up to what many of us have known for a very long time. Breathing calms your brain, heart, whole body, and mind. Scientists are doing amazing research on how breathing affects the vagus nerve. "The vagal nerve, as a proponent of the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS), is the prime candidate in explaining the effects of contemplative practices on health, mental health, and cognition"(Roderik J. S. Gerritsen and Guido P. H. Band). I trust research conducted by the National Institutes of Health (NIH).
My primary interest in posting this article is that simply focused breathing can shift our brain rhythm, heart rate, and sense of well-being in general, just a few simple breaths. I encourage many clients to pause and take three full breaths several times a day: when we get out of bed, before work/school/childcare, after work/school/childcare, and before bed. We can stop at any time in any place and take three full breaths to regulate our brain rhythm and heart rate so we can function normally. Breathing calms your brain.
I invite you to try it right now. Below is a basic technique suggested by the University of Michigan Medicine. If the situation does not support the specifics of this method, just take three full breaths to your below and release fully after each breath. Breathing calms your brain.
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"Belly breathing
Belly breathing is easy to do and very relaxing. Try this basic exercise anytime you need to relax or relieve stress.
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Sit or lie flat in a comfortable position.
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Put one hand on your belly just below your ribs and the other hand on your chest.
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Take a deep breath in through your nose, and let your belly push your hand out. Your chest should not move.
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Breathe out through pursed lips as if you were whistling. Feel the hand on your belly go in, and use it to push all the air out.
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Do this breathing 3 to 10 times. Take your time with each breath.
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Notice how you feel at the end of the exercise."
... We Can Still Be Crazy – Pema Chodron
... Three Ways to Practice Forgiveness Meditation
Do you practice forgiveness? When was the last time that you felt as if you were betrayed or disrespected by someone in your life? What did you silently, or not so silently, need on a deep, core level?
Change Is Possible – Change Really Is Possible
I am often asked a question that baffles me, "Can people REALLY change?". I am baffled because it astounds me that people do not recognize how we are all changing in large and small ways all the time. However, I do relate to the experience of feeling hopeless that I cannot change enough to enjoy life. This I understand. I can still recall clearly that night in October of 1989 when, for a moment, I felt life was not worth living. An image flashed across my mind of driving my car into my then-girlfriend, who was standing right in front of me, followed by me crashing into the large oak tree across the street. It was clear in my mind. We were arguing in the street outside of her house in front of my car. At that moment, it made complete sense to me. I felt like there was no other viable option.
At the time, I was six months clean and sober in so-called recovery; things did not feel better. In fact, they felt worse. I did not believe I could change. I did not believe life could or would improve. I did not believe I was capable of rigorous honesty as the A.A. Preamble stated; "Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty." I believed that I was not capable of being honest with myself; therefore, I could not recover. I was wrong.
A man who was forty years sober then told me if I wanted to change, I needed to tie my shoes differently. That was the beginning. All the successes I have enjoyed since that night began with one small choice. This is not some cute fable or a new-age platitude. This is my real-life experience of change and growth.
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... Want To Get Great At Something? Get A Coach!
We all need an excellent coach. I have had many amazing coaching and mentoring experiences in my life. When I was younger, the coaches were primarily with my involvement with sports. Some of my sports coaches were great at bringing out the best in me and others. Other coaches did not have the right acumen for this role and impeded the growth and development of players, including myself. Being good at something does not make you an excellent coach. And, as Atul Gawande explains in detail, excelling at something does not mean you have reached your potential. Why not be the best you can be?
When I began my journey as a social worker and counselor, my supervisors became interested in me and improved my skill set. They simultaneously pushed me beyond my perceived limitations while supporting my work. Many coaches ASSUME that you either have to push somebody hard or take their hand and gently guide them. A good coach seamlessly and instinctively knows when and how to apply each strategy. A good coach knows your strengths and obstacles to success and is willing to manage the resistance that the ego will place in the way as a hindrance. Generally speaking, the ego is the greatest obstacle to sustained growth and development. The ego may express itself as overconfidence or lack of confidence. They both are an imbalance of humility.
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... Rules For Fair Fighting In Relationships
Rules for fair fighting. It sounds like an oxymoron. If you take a minute to reflect, most of us suck when it comes to arguing and fighting with the people we love. I was not talking about your partner; I'm talking about you. Me too. Of all the things that we are taught by our families, friends, schools, and culture, children are rarely well-trained in how to manage conflict in a meaningful and productive way. Let's explore one of the many sets of rules for fair fighting in relationships together.
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