14 results for tag: Trauma


The Little Things That Make or Break Relationships

Life is often about the little things, especially in relationships. People want to know they matter and are important to us, and little things go a long way toward achieving that goal. How do you respond when the people in your life make bids and connection attempts toward you at random times throughout your days? Do you move closer or further in those moments? How does it feel when you move closer? How does it feel when you move further? I invite you to read this short article on the impact of little things on relationships....

Accepting New Reiki Counseling Clients!

Reiki counseling is a system my teacher designed for working with people through challenging and deep-seated issues. What makes it so effective is the combination of the loving and supportive energy of Reiki, helping somebody move to a slow enough brain rhythm that their inner resistance becomes less of an obstacle. Reiki also creates a safe enough container for us to work on issues that traditional therapy/counseling, bodywork, and many other modalities are not able to access in just a few sessions....

How I Got Sober and What I Now Know About the Impacts of Alcohol

How I got sober in September of 1989 was incredibly anti-climactic. Nothing was particularly awful or special about when or how I got sober. It was a Monday night, three days before I went for an alcohol assessment. I wanted to "beat the test," so I stopped drinking in advance to prove that I was n0t an alcoholic. I know; it's pretty funny, actually. Even though I have been clean and sober since September 11, 1989 (Yes. September 11th, but twelve years before THAT September 11th), my recovery has four separate phases.

How I Got Sober - Phase One

The first phase was short-lived. I was going to an outpatient program four nights per week and AA/NA meetings the other days. I hated all of it, was not interested in what they had to offer, and was only complying to prove to my girlfriend at the time and her therapist that I was not an alcoholic. I still chuckle when I think about it. That phase came to an end when I freaked out, drove my car over 100mph, passed a cop, had that cop pull me over and approach my car with his rifle pointed at me, and a whole lot of drama during the following twenty-four hours that lead to me being locked up in an in-patient mental hospital while "sober"....

Are You Really Being Accountable?

In the last handful of years, there has been an increased focus on accountability and taking responsibility for our actions. I have really appreciated the energy and attention to wanting to do and be better, primarily birthed by Gen Z and Millennials. It’s about time! But are we truly being accountable, or are we just telling people what we’ve done wrong and why we did it? I invite you to read the full article on being accountable, including the steps to cleaning up mistakes here: Are you really being accountable? Being responsible and accountable is about changing our behaviors, and the patterns that create them. It’s not about ...

Addiction Is Not The Drugs, It’s The ACEs

Addiction Is Not The Drugs, It's The ACEs. As we learn more and more about addiction, its causes, and recovery, it is not what we thought it was, or at least it is not only what we thought it was. We now know that many addicts experienced trauma(s) and adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), adolescent trauma, or multiple traumas resulting in PTSD or complex PTSD (cPTSD). Thanks to the research and work by Johann Hari, we discovered another clue to the cause of addiction, a lack of connection. We will continue to learn and develop better and more holistic treatment and recovery for addicts and alcoholics. This particular article focuses predominantly on addiction to drugs and alcohol, but it mostly definitely applies to the full spectrum of addictions. Many of us have experienced ACEs, and much has been documented about the repercussions throughout life. But what about the relationship between ACEs and addiction? Is what we call addiction just a way of creating comfort and the illusion of safety through repeated actions to relieve the symptoms of ACEs?What if you felt safe and comfortable in your mind, body, and spirit? Do you think you would still need to chase the feeling of numbness/comfort through obsessive behaviors? What if we learned that we have been "treating a stomach ache with an aspirin" all these years? What if we knew definitively that addiction is not the drugs, but something deep inside us, what would shift in you?...

Empath or Trauma Response?

Raised by Wolves, Possibly Monsters - From Mobster To Reiki Master - healthy Masculinity - recovery - healing - self-help - <span class='highlight lazy'>trauma</span>Book Release: Raised by Wolves, Possibly Monsters - From Mobster to Reiki Master, A Memoir of Awakening & Transformation. Find out more about this exciting new book here.

Buy Your Copy Now!

                    Are you an empath, or are trauma responses being expressed from childhood? In recent years, a number of people who have identified themselves as empaths have expressed an attitude of superiority to those who are not empaths. They think they are "special." I find this troubling on multiple levels. An empath is not something that you train or study to become; it is typically a response to childhood trauma and a heightened sense of vigilance. Is experiencing a challenging childhood a reason to feel superior to others?
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Stop Trying To Fix Me – I Am Not Broken

I am not broken. As often is the case when we try to "fix" somebody, we inadvertently tell them we think they are broken. Why would something need to be "fixed" if it is not broken? This poem by Jeff Foster is a beautiful Illustration of a person who has the strength and courage to say, "I am not broken!". I am not a lost cat with a broken leg, a muffler, or a hot water heater. I am a human being who deserves respect, care, affection, and attention. I am not broken. It is not your job to fix me, nor is it wanted or helpful. Love me instead....