7 results for tag: Trauma and Recovery
Accepting New Reiki Counseling Clients!
Reiki counseling is a system my teacher designed for working with people through challenging and deep-seated issues. What makes it so effective is the combination of the loving and supportive energy of Reiki, helping somebody move to a slow enough brain rhythm that their inner resistance becomes less of an obstacle. Reiki also creates a safe enough container for us to work on issues that traditional therapy/counseling, bodywork, and many other modalities are not able to access in just a few sessions....
You Can’t Change Anyone — You Can Only Make Them Think
We can't change anyone who doesn't want or isn't ready to change. While I was still doing drugs and drinking alcohol, many people wanted me to change. They needed me to change.
When I got sober in 1989, I often heard a woman named Claire share, "I didn't see the light. My ass was dragging, and I felt the heat"! This was me. The walls were closing in, and I felt like I had no options. I know that I am not alone in this experience of people wanting or needing someone to change, but they weren't ready or willing.
My more than twenty-five years as a social worker, counselor, and coach have demonstrated that we can't change anyone who isn't invested in change. But we can inspire them, offer them a new perspective, and provide safety, support, and love....
Why I Keep My Car & Desk Messy
Why I Keep My Car & Desk Messy.
I have another article published in the Elephant Journal. Here is an excerpt. The full article can be accessed through the link below.
"When I used to consume alcohol and drugs, everything in my life was messy. My bedroom was messy. My refrigerator was messy. My bathroom was messy. My laundry was messy. My car was messy. My relationships were messy. My legal situation was messy. My finances were messy. My friendships were messy. My mind was messy. My body was messy. If I got involved, it would be messy."
Please read the full article here Why I Keep My Car & Desk Messy.
I look forward to ...
How I Got Sober and What I Now Know About the Impacts of Alcohol
How I got sober in September of 1989 was incredibly anti-climactic. Nothing was particularly awful or special about when or how I got sober. It was a Monday night, three days before I went for an alcohol assessment. I wanted to "beat the test," so I stopped drinking in advance to prove that I was n0t an alcoholic. I know; it's pretty funny, actually.
Even though I have been clean and sober since September 11, 1989 (Yes. September 11th, but twelve years before THAT September 11th), my recovery has four separate phases.
How I Got Sober - Phase One
The first phase was short-lived. I was going to an outpatient program four nights per week and AA/NA meetings the other days. I hated all of it, was not interested in what they had to offer, and was only complying to prove to my girlfriend at the time and her therapist that I was not an alcoholic. I still chuckle when I think about it. That phase came to an end when I freaked out, drove my car over 100mph, passed a cop, had that cop pull me over and approach my car with his rifle pointed at me, and a whole lot of drama during the following twenty-four hours that lead to me being locked up in an in-patient mental hospital while "sober"....9 Things your Therapist wants you to Know
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this essay on things your therapist wants you to know! As a counselor, I often want to share many of the elements the author describes below. Many people make assumptions about therapists and counselors and what we know, don't know, or what we are like when we are not meeting with clients. I tend to chuckle when folks assume that I am someone who goes to bed early, gets up at dawn to meditate, and rarely if ever, goes out and comes home late at night, which I often do!
Therapists and counselors are rarely shocked by your experiences or traumas. For someone like me, who has been doing this since 1993, I have been present with folks sharing their experiences, challenges, and obstacles for a long time. I have also experienced plenty in my own life. I am ready for whatever your particular brand of mess or chaos is. We all have messes in our lives!...
Are You Really Being Accountable?
In the last handful of years, there has been an increased focus on accountability and taking responsibility for our actions. I have really appreciated the energy and attention to wanting to do and be better, primarily birthed by Gen Z and Millennials. It’s about time!
But are we truly being accountable, or are we just telling people what we’ve done wrong and why we did it?
I invite you to read the full article on being accountable, including the steps to cleaning up mistakes here: Are you really being accountable?
Being responsible and accountable is about changing our behaviors, and the patterns that create them. It’s not about ...
Porn Addiction, Loneliness and Connection
Porn addiction is increasing at a rapid pace. We know that access to online porn continues to create loneliness, disconnection, and porn addiction. But is porn the actual problem? Again, we come back to Johann Hari's findings. His research and personal experiences, as well as my own, support the theory that addictions often lack meaningful connection(s). This applies to porn addiction as well. The work we do in recovery from porn addiction includes focusing on creating new connections and strengthening those already existing. These connections and forming new habits can begin the process of feeling safe and a sense of belonging, all foundations of a sustainable recovery....
