41 results for tag: Providence relationship Counseling
Rules For Fair Fighting In Relationships
Rules for fair fighting. It sounds like an oxymoron. If you take a minute to reflect, most of us suck when it comes to arguing and fighting with the people we love. I was not talking about your partner; I'm talking about you. Me too. Of all the things that we are taught by our families, friends, schools, and culture, children are rarely well-trained in how to manage conflict in a meaningful and productive way. Let's explore one of the many sets of rules for fair fighting in relationships together.
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... Spiritual Bypassing, Relationships and The Shadow
I first started becoming aware of spiritual bypassing a few years ago. My eyes opened wide as I was reading the page in front of me. "A spiritual bypass or spiritual bypassing is a "tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks" John Welwood & Tina Fossella. This was it! This was the thing I had been aware of for years in myself and others that I had not known what it was or how to describe it! I was so excited that there really was such a "thing," and it had a name.
I have cut out parts of the article below, but most of the content on spiritual bypassing is included.
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Do Feelings Matter? Refections on Feelings in Our Lives
I was recently reading an article in Psychology Today, Life Lessons: 16 Truths to Embrace Now. Providence Holistic Counseling Services is listed in Psychology Today, so I receive a print copy monthly. I rarely read the articles because they feel like typical pop culture, with sensationalistic headlines and not a lot of solid content. I also find that the cover is typically an image of a young, white, attractive, thin female Photoshopped to look seductive with thick lipstick covering parted lips. An embarrassment to the industry. Now and then, I am wrong, and they dig a little deeper. The ideas of the various writers who contributed to this article are helpful and well-written. One of them referenced how the current generation of young adults places a great preference on what they feel and their emotions. This got me thinking. The question that came to mind is, "Do feelings matter?"
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... Listen To Their Story – Ex-CIA Undercover Officer
The video below is titled "Former Undercover CIA Officer Talks War And Peace." While I was listening and watching, what was loudest to me was how this applies to everyday life, not just foreign wars. What if we listen to their story as a practice we all follow when trying to resolve conflicts with partners, lovers, friends, family, neighbors, and co-workers?
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... Self-Perception: Barb
It was 1993, and I had recently moved to a new area of New Jersey where I knew few people. We were both attending meetings of the same self-help group. It had been six months since the first time I saw Barb. I fell for her before she even opened her mouth. She was soft, warm, and genuine in her walk and demeanor. When she opened her mouth to speak, there were no more questions; I wanted to get to know her. The only thing between Barb and I was self-perception, which was mine.
Self-Perception and Shyness
A common trait for me, then and now, is being shy and intimidated by women I find attractive. Besides the obvious challenge of shyness, I would ...
Open Up – School of Life
Open Up is a short video demonstrating the power of honesty and sharing our secrets. Communication is essential to creating and maintaining positive relationships. The risk seems too great, but is it really? I encourage you to explore which is a greater risk: isolation and silence or sharing and connection.
Open Up by The School of Life
...Dating Is Scary, But Why? Part I – The Breakup
Dating is scary, but why? During conversations with clients, friends, and family, I often hear men and women talk about how dating is scary. If you think about it, dating should not be scary, but dating is scary. But why is dating scary? I heard somebody once say, "Dating is scary because there are only two possible outcomes. You will either spend the rest of your life with someone, or you will break up. Both are scary." For our conversation today, we are not going to discuss intimate violence in dating, but I did want to acknowledge how scary date and acquaintance rape is. I am not minimizing or neglecting date and acquaintance rape; it's just not what we're going to focus on in this discussion.
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