Spiritual Training on Humility: The Janitor Part I
It was the Winter of 1993-1994. I had only once visited the Tibetan Buddhist Learning Center, Labsum Shedrup Ling, in Washington, New Jersey. A good friend and I decided we’d spend New Year’s together on a retreat at the center. The retreat focused on the Buddhist Lineage, which I had no idea what that meant upon arrival. Before I dive in, I would like to mention that I knew very little about Buddhism or Tibetan Buddhism in general when we signed up to take part; my friend did. I just knew that I had an Inner Connection with Buddhism.
The first time I noticed him was during the first shared meal. He sat somewhat distant from most guests, but I could tell he lived there. He wore plain grey pants and a shirt like the ones most janitors wear. He seemed almost disinterested in the events and happenings around him. The man appeared to be enjoying his meal, content and grateful just to be there. The first thought I had while watching him was, “WOW! If this is what their janitors are like, I can’t wait to see the monks! I am going to become a Buddhist.” He helped clean up as if he did it every day, and it was part of what he does there. He showed people where to find things as a typical worker would do at any other place. But there was something very different about this janitor. He was simple and radiant in his way of being, smiling with sincerity and beauty. I noticed myself staring and observing him beyond what is socially acceptable, but I couldn’t stop myself. He was exceptional in a way that I had not known before. I was in awe of how this man carried himself and the Inner contentment that was his being. I remember thinking, “Where do they find janitors like this in Tibet?” Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, he was an older Tibetan man, possibly in his sixties, with those facial features that only men and women who have walked this earth for a while and have learned more than the rest of us express. The lines on their faces seem deeper and richer, as if each were telling a story.
During lunch the following day, I talked with an interesting young man named Tom and asked about the janitor. Tom smiled and informed me, “He is not the janitor.” I immediately felt embarrassed. Tom continued, “He is one of the men who helped lead the Dalai Llama on his exile from Tibet to India.” I froze and thought, “I’m such an idiot!” When I regained my composure, I asked Tom, “Is he a monk?” He smiled again, “Yes, he is definitely a monk. He decided that after successfully leading the Dalai Llama safely to India, he could stop wearing his robe and dress like the rest of us.”
I did get to meet and share conversations with this radiant man over the next year or so; he was very kind and gentle. To me, this is spirituality. I say this because he exudes the virtues I think of when considering being a spiritual practitioner: simple, kind, and warm. He is interested in paying little attention to himself or his accomplishments. He expresses genuine Humility but is not self-defeating or a doormat. Honesty and Truth ooze out of every part of his being; he is not “acting” to show us what these traits are like; he is them.
“Pride is concerned with who is right. Humility is concerned with what is right.” Ezra Taft Benson
Spiritual Training on Humility – Spiritual Practitioners
In America, Buddhists and spiritual practitioners are often well-versed in Buddhism and its Teachings and philosophy, ready to engage in intellectual debate. To me, this is not a true Buddhist or spiritual practitioner. Buddhists and spiritual practitioners do not show off their knowledge or meditation skills, for no other reason than the Humility of knowing that we all truly know very little, and that what we know today as “Truth” may shift as we develop and evolve. Being able to quote Koans is different from being able to live Koans. Sitting for long periods is different from reading for long periods.
I want to evolve to be “as dull as dishwater”. I am not there, not always willing to let go of my desire for attention and recognition. People often confuse Humility with self-deprecation. Humility is being “right size,” not big or small, weak or strong, aggressive or passive, best or worst, etc., allowing our True Self to shine. The moments I experience this kind of Humility are typically in Genuine Prayer or service to others. I heard somebody once say, “Do something good for somebody else every day and not get caught.” This is the essence of “the janitor.” He is an exceptional somebody, but appearing as a total nobody.
If this man led the Dalia Llama’s exile to safety, is there anything the rest of us have accomplished that warrants thinking we are better than anyone else?
Can you imagine what the world would be like if we did one thing every day for somebody else without getting caught? Are you up for the challenge?
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Michael Swerdloff
Providence Holistic Counseling Services